In a stunning turn of events, whatsoninvers.nz can exclusively reveal that New Zealand may soon become the 51st state of the United States. Sources indicate that the groundwork for this historic partnership has been quietly but rapidly developing, culminating in a series of top-level discussions over the past fortnight. Although officials on both sides have remained tight-lipped, anonymous insiders have confirmed the major elements of the deal.
Adding weight to the speculation, one of the aircraft in the US government fleet, the C-32—a modified Boeing 757 often used by senior officials—landed at a private New Zealand airfield over the weekend. Sources say US President Donald Trump was on board, accompanied by a small team of advisors. Key Kiwi figures, including the Prime Minister and Deputy Prime Minister, boarded the plane to finalise the agreement.
Foreign Affairs Minister Winston Peters had recently travelled to Washington DC, where he met with Secretary of State Marco Rubio. Following the meeting, Peters stated, “We came here to listen to the new Administration and to be clear about what is important to New Zealand. Today, we enjoyed substantive and productive discussions with Secretary Rubio across a broad range of issues.”
According to US sources, the partnership will bring benefits to both nations. One official remarked, “We get New Zealand with all its beauty, mineral resources, great movie locations and cool way of life. New Zealand gets further access to the huge market that is the mighty USA tariff-free, plus you get protection from the US military.”
Another added, “We’ve already got New York, New Jersey and New Hampshire, now we get New Lynn, New Brighton and New Zealand!”
A contact from Wellington described the deal as “putting everything else like school lunches in the shade.”
Once official, the partnership is expected to be fast-tracked. “They won’t let the ink dry on this one,” one source said.
